The Power of Tension Blogfest

Why another Blogfest? The answer is quite simple, I saw this blogfest and I had to. 

“We want to see how tense your fiction can be. Give us an excerpt (up to 300 words) from your manuscript or recently completed work (or just a random scene) that drips with tension and will tie us in knots wanting to know more. It doesn’t matter what the piece is about, as long as it screams tension.”


If you want to enter you will find the link on my sidebar. So here is my entry, an excerpt  from a short fiction I am writing called:

"The Green Smasher"

One day my little brother and I were playing marbles. Willie, that was my brothers name, had this beautiful green marble that I had my eyes on and wanted really bad. The problem was that Willie never would trade it. I had tried everything I could think of to win that marble and Willie knew it. He just sat there and smiled at me for the longest time and then he said, “There is one way that maybe you can win the green smasher. That is if you dare.” I could tell by the look on his face that he was up to something and that something was not going to be good. As soon as the words came out, I wished that I could take them back.

“Ok smarty-pants, whatever it is, let’s make it a double dare! If I win the green smasher than you have to be my slave for a day.” Willie looked at me and said, “What if you lose, what do I get?” I really didn’t think that Willie was that smart and I guess I was right because he agreed when I said that he could keep the green smasher if I lost.

Willie climbed up onto one of fathers bar stools and took down his favorite shot glass. He sat it on the floor between us and said, “If you can throw a marble into fathers glass then you can have the green smasher.” I took a deep breath, picked up the biggest marble I had, took careful aim and made my toss. We both just stared at each other and at the broken glass on the floor.

Finally Willie said almost in a whisper, “Oh, oh. You are so going to get the paddle.” “No way, it was all your idea!” I screamed back at him. and then I cleaned up the broken glass as best as I could while my stupid brother just stood there with a terrified look on his face.

Between half muffled sobs he said, “Maybe he won’t notice.” We knew that he would be coming home soon so we quickly packed away our marbles, scattered into our room and for some reason decided it was best to hide under the bed. It didn’t take long before we heard father scream out the names he always gave us which  meant big trouble, “Sister… Brother! Get your scrawny behinds out here RIGHT NOW!”

We crawled out from under the bed, took each other by the hand and slowly made our way down the hall to where our father stood.  The closer we got the more terrified we were. He stood there like an evil giant holding the paddle like a weapon ready to spring into action.