Learning another language has been very challenging for me. Through the years I have made my fair share of mistakes and come across some rather funny translations. Here are some of them:
Excuse me, I always rape after a good meal
You can only do 30 farts on this street
I want you to be God when you go to your friend’s house.
Hår (pronounced whore) hair
There is a whore in my food
Gift-married, also poison
You gave me the perfect poison
I have a gift girl I want you to meet.
Mus (pronounced moose)-mouse
The cat ate another moose
Pikk (pick)- penise
Do you always use a penise when you play the guitar
Brus (Bruce)- soda pop
On a hot day a big Bruce really tastes great
Ratt –steering wheel
The rat is loose in my car
Dugg( pronounced dog)- dew
There is a lot of dog on my window
Its not the fart that kills you its the smell
That line is funny because a Norwegian rally driver said it to a journalist in all seriousness.
There are a lot of school executions here in this town (misuse of the word excursions)
When I first came to Norway I didn’t speak more than a few words of Norwegian. Where ever I went all I heard were a bunch of sounds that made no sense, like a bunch of chickens squawking. Often I find myself speaking Nor-lish and making up words that seem to fit. My Norwegian has gotten a lot better but I still make a lot of mistakes, speak a strange dialect and get laughed at a lot. I have done some translating for the town of Larvik, and I have worked as a substitute teacher at an elementary school. One thing I have learned, something’s just get lost in translation and I found out a long time ago that Jokes are impossible to translate. I will be adding to this list in the future, but for now have some fun and a few laughs with some Norwegian Farts and look here you got to be kidding me . Try not to get lost along the way. Happy Friday or as they say in Norwegian God Fredag!
Magickal Intentions: Love, Romance, Marriage, Sexual Matters, Physical Beauty, Friendship and Partnerships, Strangers and Heart
Incense: Strawberry, Sandalwood, Rose, Saffron and Vanilla
Sign: Libra and Taurus
Colors: Green, Pink, Aqua
Herbs/Plants: Pink Rose, Ivy, Birch, Heather, Clematis, Sage, Violet and Water Lilly Stones: Rose Quartz, Moonstone, Pink Tourmaline, Peridot, Emerald and Jade
Oil: (Venus) Cardamom, Palmrosa, Rose, Yarrow
Friday belongs to Venus, and its energies are warm, sensuous, and fulfilling. Efforts that involve any type of pleasure, comfort, and luxury, as well as the arts, music, or aroma (incense and perfume) works well on this day. As Venus lends its sensuous influences to the energies of this day, use it for any magical work that deals with matters of the heart.