Resurrection Blogfest

 Double booked today so for my  Insecure Writers Support Group Post please click Here

First off, I know that many of you might be scared off when you run across Mina Lobos Some Dark Romantic first page blog impression which reads....

 Content Warning
...blah blah blah.

Do not let this put you off visiting Mina's blog. Mina is a Goth Mom who loves to write and has a great sence of humor. I love visiting her blog and I am sure you will as well, Check out her blog for yourself and see.

Now on to my Resurrection Blog Post which is part of Mina's one year blogging anniversary. Happy Blogaversary Mina! To check out other Resurrection Posts and the rules for this blogfest please go to her site. During my first year of blogging this is the post I would like to resurrect. I choose it hoping it gives you a good chuckle!

 Written first on my blog Friday March 18, 2011

Lost in Translation

Learning another language has been very challenging for me. Through the years I have made my fair share of mistakes and come across some rather funny translations. Here are some of them:

Rape-burp

Excuse me, I always rape after a good meal

Fart-speed

You can only do 30 farts on this street

God-good

I want you to be God when you go to your friend’s house.

Hår (pronounced whore) hair

There is a whore in my food

Gift-married, also poison

You gave me the perfect poison

I have a gift girl I want you to meet.

Mus (pronounced moose)-mouse

The cat ate another moose 

Pikk (pick)- penise

Do you always use a penise when you play the guitar 

Brus (Bruce)- soda pop

On a hot day a big Bruce really tastes great

Ratt –steering wheel

The rat is loose in my car

Dugg( pronounced dog)- dew

There is a lot of dog on my window

Smell -crash

Its not the fart that kills you its the smell 

That line is funny because a Norwegian rally driver said it to a journalist in all seriousness. 

There are a lot of school executions here in this town (misuse of the word excursions)  

When I first came to Norway I didn’t speak more than a few words of Norwegian. Where ever I went all I heard were a bunch of sounds that made no sense, like a bunch of chickens squawking. Often I find myself speaking Nor-lish and making up words that seem to fit. My Norwegian has gotten a lot better but I still make a lot of mistakes, speak a strange dialect and get laughed at a lot. I have done some translating for the town of Larvik, and I have worked as a substitute teacher at an elementary school. One thing I have learned, something’s just get lost in translation and I found out a long time ago that Jokes are impossible to translate. I will be adding to this list in the future, but for now have some fun and a few laughs with some Norwegian Farts and look here you got to be kidding me . Try not to get lost along the way. Happy Friday or as they say in Norwegian God Fredag!

Home Invasion

Storm season is here and while I sit inside listening to a crackling fire I can still hear the sounds of the crashing waves and the howling wind outside my window. 

Weather attitude darkens my mood and as the days are getting shorter my sunny disposition is being constantly tested. Here in southern Norway we have had nothing but rain and storms for the past two weeks and although there is still no sign of snow the mice have decided that they have had enough of the soggy grass outside our door and moved inside to avoid the weather. 

Imagine trying to sleep at night while listening to the sound of tiny feet scrambling above your head. That my friend is when you make sure you have your feet tightly tucked beneath the blanket, poke the person beside you in bed and say, “Did you hear that?” Finally after doing that several times the response is, “Go back to sleep, it’s just a mouse or two.” Go back to sleep! As if I had fallen asleep in the first place! Finally I end up falling asleep with visions of mice nibbling on my toes. This has been going on all week-end; needless to say I am very tired. Major goal today is mice eviction. I thought it was a man’s job to protect his family from home invasion…sigh…

Any of you out there have a weather attitude or a problem with home invasion? 

Don’t forget this Wednesday is the Insecure Writers Support Group. I double booked myself with both the IWSG and the Resurrection blogfest to celebrate Mina Lobo’s one year blogging anniversary. Check out both, it’s not too late to join the fun.