Sunday, December 4, 2016

Change is hard


Oh My God! Where does time go? It has really been a long time since I have scribbled here. The fact is that I have been suffering a writer melt down. No…more like a nuclear LIFE meltdown. So much has happened and I have been stuck on pause for a long time now.

Starting over again at my age is not easy. Change is not easy. Been there, done that more than once. So once again my marriage has failed and I find myself alone. My husband came home from work one day and said, “I want to start over. I want a divorce.” I guess that was his new year’s resolution since he told me this just after New Year’s Eve 2016. We had been together for over 30 years- We share two children and So… we ended up selling our home and I ended up finding a new place to live as well as a new job. As if that wasn’t enough, my mother died soon after. It has been a rough year and I cannot find  words for my feelings. I will try as best as I can to share with you this journey ,and my hope is that by sharing my thoughts and by scribbling them down into “internet space” I will find something or someone that makes me feel like I am not alone.

Enough for now but I will continue to share my thoughts and I will not wait so long this time.


6 comments:

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Siv - how awful and what a time ... just thoughtless. I am sorry but hope now you can move forward - not easy though ... and these journeys are so frustrating apart from all the emotional charges we need to go through. My thoughts and I'll be thinking of you ... but we're here ... I know the blog helped me hugely ... but I have never written about it - my postings took my thoughts away to other realms ... and then the comments were a release to read up. All the very best now - and with positive vibes coming over ... Hilary

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Siv! It's been so long.
I am so sorry. That was a crappy thing to do to someone.
But you are a strong woman. I have faith in that and in the One who will help you heal. Please keep sharing with us. You are not alone!

Geoff Maritz said...

Hello Siv.
Very sorry to hear about your troubles. Yes, 2016 has been a rough year for me too but hey, at my age, I'm now an expert at starting over. A bit heartbroken about having to start over on my birthday, September 15 in a city in which I have no friends, you, I'm sure are a little better of so, don't look down but up, that's where God lives and I know He loves you and will comfort and bring you up from the depths again.
How's this for an uplifting fact? The best years for wine harvests are always the odd years, that means next year is going to be fabulous. Courage and trust my lovely friend. I will be hear should you be interested in chatting, Geoff in sweltering Johannesburg South Africa.

Sally said...

So sorry to hear you've had such a rough year - my rough year was back in 1999 when a similar thing happened to me. Now, 2016, my life is better than ever. so even though it is tough going through this rough time, things will get better at some point.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

Oh, Siv! What your husband is looking for he will never find -- which is his youth and new beginnings. I wish you lived closer. :-(

This year has been so rough, but you will pull through because you are a triumphant soul deep inside.

My prayers are with you. May the Father grant you the light to see what your next step should be and the strength to take it.

Every winter has its spring ahead, and yours may be closer than you believe. Roland

Karen Walker said...

Dear Siv,
My heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry you've been in such pain. I know you will get through this. Keep your faith and keep writing, even if you don't publish on your blog. My writing has helped me through so much pain. We're here whenever you choose to surface.